Sound Off: Usher’s Ex-Wife, Tameka Foster, Deserves an Apology for Fans' Colorism

In this ‘Sound Off,’ I explain how Usher’s ex-wife Tameka Foster’s bullying from his fans had everything to do with colorism.

Mar. 14 2024, Published 6:18 p.m. ET

Although I was a child during Usher’s rise to fame in the ‘90s and early ‘00s, I was one of many delulu girls who believed she would one day become Mrs. Raymond IV. So, imagine my surprise when I discovered that Usher married Tameka Foster, his former stylist and first wife, in 2007. Immediately, Tameka earned a side-eye only an eighth grader could give because how dare she take my future husband?

Unsurprisingly, I wasn’t the only one vying to be Usher’s one and only. Usher is a global superstar with billions of fans who have noticed he’s not hard to look at. However, instead of practicing their best side-eye like I did, many within Usher’s fandom (jokingly nicknamed "The Usher Board") dragged Tameka through the mud for her and Usher’s age difference, her status in the industry compared to his, and, more frequently, her looks.

Now that some of us know all of the “isms” (colorism, ageism, racism) and just any unsolicited take on a woman’s appearance is wrong, it’s time for some of Usher’s fans to realize Tameka deserves an apology.

Usher and Tameka Foster’s marriage critiques were riddled with racism, colorism, and ageism.

Although they were only married from 2007 until 2009, Usher and Tameka have said the backlash from their union ultimately affected their marriage, notwithstanding the test of time.

In March 2024, Tameka further shared that she believed the bullying had much to do with who the public felt Usher “should” marry.

During the fashion stylist–turned–reality TV star's March 12, 2024 appearance on Carlos King’s podcast, Reality With the King, she discussed how, before dating and marrying Usher, she felt fully secure in herself, stating she was the pretty and popular girl in her neighborhood. She also said she believed she and Usher would still be together had she not received so much public scrutiny.

Almost immediately after word got out that Tameka was Usher’s main squeeze, the public’s opinion about her included jokes about her being older than Usher's eight-year age difference, the fact that she had several children before their marriage, and the fact that she worked behind the scenes of the media industry. As a Black, dark-skinned woman, she received comments about her looks and was often called a man, sparking homophobic and transphobic rhetoric.

Throughout their marriage, Usher defended Tameka, the mother of two of his four children, Usher V and Naviyd. One of the more poignant times was during his 2008 TRL appearance. The “Yeah!” singer dismissed rumors he and Tameka were divorcing and addressed the hate they received about Tameka’s age.

“There was a little rumor earlier this week about us separating,” he said, per BET News. “It ain't true. We are in love ... My wife is not 40 years old. I love her to death."

As Tameka stated in her 2024 interview on Reality With the King, Usher’s remarks about her on TRL aren’t available on MTV’s social media accounts, where many of the network’s throwback moments reside. It feels telling a network that has benefitted from nostalgia with the resurgence of shows like Jersey Shore and MTV Cribs would overlook a Black man defending his wife’s honor after she was being bullied online while pregnant with his child. But I digress.

It is more than possible for Usher’s fans to discuss Tameka Foster’s flaws without mentioning her looks.

Colorism is, sadly, something Black women have dealt with forever. In the reality TV world we’ve seen it play out repeatedly, and now, stars like Erica Mena are finally facing the necessary consequences for their colorist remarks. But as shows like The Real Housewives of Potomac — where several light-skinned cast members routinely beef with the dark-skinned ones — demonstrate, we still have a long way to go regarding colorism going away altogether.

Though Usher told People in February 2024 that the backlash he received from marrying Tameka made him “very closed” and “[feel] attacked in many ways” by his fans’ behavior, his fandom has never expressed any compassion toward Tameka, even after she and Usher dealt with the untimely death of her son Kile Glover, who was killed in 2012 after being struck by a jet ski while floating in an inner tube in Lake Lanier.

Two years after Kile’s death, Tameka made her reality TV debut on VH1’s Atlanta Exes. She received more comments about her appearance on the show, though none were warranted. In all honesty, Tameka was A LOT on Atlanta Exes, but her extraness on the one-season reality show had nothing to do with how she looked. But, once again, judging her solely for her looks is low-hanging fruit someone on Twitter will gladly take.

When judging Tameka, valid commentary could include her behavior on either Atlanta Exes or her current WeTV show, Bold & Bougie. You could also drag her for her homophobic tweets from December 2011 since we know how fun digging those up can be.

Basically, judge her for anything other than her being a dark-skinned woman who one of the most famous singers of our lifetime married and made his baby mama. So, apologize to Tameka and any Black women of all shades who deserve to be loved out loud and — surprise — are adored by your faves.

ncG1vNJzZmivp6x7pbXSramam6Ses7p6wqikaKhfqLy2usNmpp%2BeXarAqbHRZpyxZaees6Z505qknqORYrOwv9OeqWaclaiys8LErGSapl2WvbC4zqCwZp6ipLputMisZJ%2BZnqg%3D